What Informed Consent Really Means in the Birth Room
And how to make sure you're actually getting it
You’ve probably heard the term “informed consent” mentioned during prenatal visits, birth classes, or in hospital paperwork. But here’s the truth: many women are not actually receiving true informed consent in the birth room. Instead, they’re being rushed, pressured, or given incomplete information under the guise of protocol.
This blog breaks down what informed consent really means, how to recognize when it’s missing, and how to take back control of your care during labor and birth.
🔍 What Is Informed Consent?
True informed consent means you are fully informed and freely agree to what’s being offered, without pressure, fear, or manipulation.
It includes five essential parts:
Disclosure – You’re told exactly what the procedure or intervention is, and why it’s being recommended.
Understanding – You’re given time and space to ask questions and understand your options.
Voluntariness – You are not pressured, guilted, or coerced into agreeing.
Competency – You’re mentally and emotionally capable of making your own decisions.
Consent – You explicitly agree. Or you don’t, and that’s your right.
Informed consent is not just about saying “yes.”
It’s about knowing you have the right to say no, and being respected either way.
🚩 What Informed Consent Doesn’t Look Like
Too often, women are faced with rushed decisions, vague language, or subtle coercion. Here are common examples of non-consensual care:
“We’re just going to check you real quick, okay?” (as they put on gloves)
“It’s just standard procedure.”
“We really need to do this if you care about your baby.”
Not explaining what’s happening until after it's already being done
No opportunity to ask questions or take time to decide
These are not harmless shortcuts. They are red flags, and often contribute to birth trauma even when the outcome is “healthy.”
✅ What It Should Look Like
Respectful providers know that birth is a partnership, not a dictatorship. Real informed consent looks like:
Being told the benefits and risks of any procedure
Learning about alternatives, including doing nothing
Having time to discuss with your partner or doula
Hearing your provider say, “What would you like to do?”
Being able to change your mind at any point
Here’s what respectful care sounds like:
“Your baby’s heart rate is having some dips. One option is to place an internal monitor, which means breaking your water. There’s a small risk of infection with that, but it gives us better information. Another option is to continue external monitoring for now. How do you feel about that?”
This is a conversation, not a command.
🧠 How to Stay in Control
In labor, it can be hard to think clearly, especially when you’re tired or overwhelmed. But there are tools that help you pause and stay grounded.
Use the BRAIN method:
Benefits – What are the benefits of this procedure?
Risks – What are the risks, both short- and long-term?
Alternatives – Are there other options?
Intuition – What is my gut telling me?
Nothing – What happens if we wait or do nothing?
Use clear phrases like:
“I’d like more time to decide.”
“Can you explain the risks and benefits?”
“I’m not comfortable with that right now.”
“I do not consent.”
If you’re deep in labor, your partner or doula can use these phrases on your behalf.
💡 Real-Life Examples
Not consent:
A nurse says, “I’m just going to give you something to speed things up,” and starts Pitocin without asking.
➡️ You weren’t asked. You weren’t informed. That’s not consent.
Consent:
A provider says, “We’re seeing your labor slow a bit. Pitocin is an option to consider, but it’s totally up to you. Want to talk about it together?”
➡️ You’re invited into the decision and given space to choose.
💥 Why It Matters
Consent isn't just a legal checkbox. It’s how we protect women’s dignity, autonomy, and safety in birth. When you’re not truly informed, or when your voice is ignored, it can cause lasting emotional harm, even if everything “looks fine” on paper.
Feeling respected and in control matters.
Birth isn’t just about the baby, it’s also about you.
👣 Final Thoughts
You are not a passive participant in your birth. You are the decision-maker. Informed consent is your right, not a courtesy. You don’t have to accept anything just because it’s “routine.” You have the right to slow down, ask questions, decline, and speak up. Your body, your birth, your decisions.
Looking for more tools to take back your power in labor?
Read: No Permission Needed
Read: From Skepticism to Strength: How to Question Everything and Trust Yourself
